Well, I think it's safe to say that today was the most humiliating day of my life. But honestly, I find it quite hysterically funny. Today, I had the dance & vocal auditions for Kiss Me, Kate with Garland Summer Musicals. First was the dance audition.
I got there at the appointed time only to have to sit for well over an hour and watch the tap auditions for Singin' in the Rain. Mind you, I am not a dancer. I've never had a formal dance lesson a day in my life, and I hardly think the years of swing dancing in college count toward anything other than recreation. Boy, did this become evident when we finally got called to learn our number...in twenty minutes. Ever heard the phrase "lost as a goose in a snowstorm?" Yeah, well, that was totally me. We had this lady choreographer who clearly was born with dancing shoes on her feet and started "talking shop" with a guy who had been with both the Dallas Ballet and Dallas Black Ballet. "Oh boy," I thought, "I'm way out of my league...maybe I should just leave now, tell them thanks but I can't dance...nah, I'll stick it out. Maybe it won't be too hard. Maybe I'll be able to pick it up like I did the swing dances back in the day...." It was clear in the first ten seconds that I was NOT going to pick up this little number very quickly, particularly since she started speaking a foreign language (i.e. yelling a bunch of dance moves that made no sense to me) and moving on sequence-to-sequence like we all had a clue. Well, maybe 99% of the room had a clue, but I did not. After 20 min, yep just an abysmal 20 min, we were asked to dance for the artistic director of the production.
Lovely. I'm clueless and now have to actually audition for the "big kahuna." I decided just to laugh it off. What else could I do? I clearly was not going to get a role based on my dance audition, so I might as well not even worry about it. Two times through the number and "thank you." We got our paperwork back to take the vocal audition. "Please feel free to fill out your form. Tell us your strengths or something about yourself that might give us some insight into who you are." Well, buddy, I can tell you I AM NOT A DANCER!!! But I can be taught...in a lot more than 20 min.
Got to go home at 4 p.m. to rest for my vocal audition at 7 p.m. I decided that I would go back for 6:30, just in case I could get worked in early. Sure enough, I got to sing just a few minutes after checking in. I sang "Out of My Dreams" from Oklahoma! and was then called before the panel. I got called back! So I plan to sing my other piece (and perhaps prepare another one, just in case) for that. I highly doubt I'll have to dance again. Let's just say I highly hope I don't have to dance again at my callback.
My one relief with the next audition (for WaterTower)...I don't think it involves dancing, thank God!!!